Monday, 26 March 2012

It has been three years ...

since Abah left us. When Mama was choosing the pictures for this entry, Mama cried silently. Looking at Abah's pictures brings a lot of happy memories. Abah in the car, obligingly posed when Mama asked him to. Abah smiling at the camera barely a week after our wedding. Abah at the optometrist, trying out his new shades. Abah and the children, barely 5 months and one year plus at the time.And lastly, our wedding picture.
Mama was 40 when Abah was (sort of) introduced to her. Abah fell in love with Mama straight away (that's what he told Mama) but Abah was 15 years older and a widower with 6 children. Mama was not even slightly interested. But Abah was determined. He called Mama every night without fail. He told Mama he was sincere to make Mama his wife. He was looking for a wife for him, not a mother for his children so Mama need not worry about the children. Mama was still not interested and even introduced some of Mama's friend to Abah with the hope that Abah would eventually go away. But no, he was still there. As determined as ever.
A month later, Mama dared Abah to come and see Atok and Nenek and ask for Mama's hand in marriage. Mama thought her parents would somehow say no. But Mama was mistaken. Atok and Nenek were so relieved that someone was actually interested in their spinster daughter that they said yes straight away. Mama and Abah was married a month after that and the rest is history.
One of Mama's friends said despite what had happened (Abah's death), Mama is actually a lucky person. When Mama asked her why, she said that after being a single girl for so long, Mama finally got married at 40 (Some people don't get married at all) And not many people are lucky to have babies / children although they got married at a younger age. Despite Mama being an "elderly primagravida" (the doctors kept repeating this term during Mama's pregnancy check ups), we are blessed with a boy and a girl. And Abah didn't spend days in hospitals because God knows that it would be difficult for Mama to care for him with two very young children(Some people spend days and even months in hospitals and takes a toll on the caregivers especially the spouse).
Today marks the third year Abah left us:- Mama, Bro H and Sis A. The children seem to be accepting the fact that there are only three of us in the family. When people ask them about Abah, they'd readily answer, "Abah mati" (Abah is dead). There is no sadness in their voices, they are still too young anyway.
Well, life goes on but being human, Mama sometimes asks herself, the ifs and the hows.


  1. I said a prayer for you today.
    I just took a moment to say,
    With heartfelt thankfulness,
    How much I know I am blessed
    With the love so deep and true
    That I received from you.
    It may not always show,
    But darling, I always know
    That God gave you to me
    And I will ever be
    A grateful, loving wife
    All throughout my life.
    I love you with all my heart
    And so a day will never pass
    In which I cannot say:
    I said a prayer for you today.

  2. ..your late hubby was a friend..we lost touch when pakmat moved out of baung bayam...alFatihah..may he forever be under Allah's care...

  3. MasyaAllah, what a small world.